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ForeverMirin

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  1. A Scottish farmer was in his field digging up his tatties . An American farmer looked over the fence and said "In Texas we grow potatoes 5 times larger than that!" The Scotsman replied " Ah but we just grow them for our own mouths!"
  2. One day an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman walked into a pub together. They each bought a pint of Guinness. Just as they were about to enjoy their creamy beverage, three flies landed in each of their pints, and were stuck in the thick head. The Englishman pushed his beer away in disgust. The Scotsman fished the fly out of his beer, and continued drinking it, as if nothing had happened. The Irishman, too, picked the fly out of his drink, held it out over the beer, and started yelling, "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT YOU BAS**RD!!!!"
  3. A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in their bed. She puts on her robe and goes down stairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front him. He appears deep in thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of coffee. "What's the matter, dear?" she whispers as she steps into the room. "Why are you down here at this time of night?" The husband looks up, "Do you remember 20 years ago when we were dating, and you were only 17?" he asks solemnly. The wife is touched thin
  4. Q: How do you tell if a chick is too fat to fuck ? A: When you pull her pants down her ass is still in them
  5. A man received the following text from his neighbour: I am so sorry Bob. I've been riddled with guilt and I have to confess. I have been tapping your wife, day and night when you're not around. In fact, more than you. I'm not getting any at home, but that's no excuse. I can no longer live with the guilt and I hope you will accept my sincerest apology with my promise that it won't happen again. The man, anguished and betrayed, went into his bedroom, grabbed his gun, and without a word, shot his wife and killed her. A few moments later, a second text came in: Bloody predictive te
  6. I just read "The shorter the journey to work, the more risks drivers are willing to take." Nonsense. I never take risks on my way to work. And I can get there before my windscreen's even defrosted.
  7. It started raining, so i took shelter in a peekaboo sex shop. I paid £50 and was confronted by 3 doors reading blonde, brunette,or black, I chose blonde. Only to be confronted by more doors reading small tits, medium tits, or big tits. I chose big tits, only to be confronted by yet more doors. They read small cunt, large cunt,or wet cunt. I chose wet cunt, and found myself back outside in the fuckin rain!
  8. I told my girlfriend that my mom is old so she needs to speak slowly and loud. Then I told my mom my girlfriend is retarded. They have no idea!
  9. I was walking along the street the other day when I slipped in dog shit. A minute later, some guy did exactly the same thing. I said to him, "I just did that." So, he punched me in the face and called me a dirty bastard.
  10. I was at the bar the other night and overheard three very hefty women talking at the bar. Their accent appeared to be Scottish, so I approached and asked, "Hello, are you three lassies from Scotland?" One of them angrily screeched, "It's Wales, Wales you bloody idiot!" So I apologized and replied, "I am so sorry. Are you three whales from Scotland?" And that's the last thing I remember. Sånn type humor DIGGER jeg. Punish me (babes) Why don't women know how to ski? Because it doesn't snow between the kitchen and the bedroom. What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?
  11. Fit nok til å gjøre jobben si og litt til.
  12. Jeg finner ikke ut hvordan jeg gjør det. Kan jeg sende på pm?
  13. Nei har ikke fått noe info. Fikk første skuddet tirdag. skal tilbake om 6 uker. Hadde veldig lave verdier. Jeg tenkte på hjelp til hva jeg skal måle, fri testo osv. er så mye.
  14. Tror det er boren. Jeg skal ha begge. https://scontent-a-fra.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xap1/v/t1.0-9/10480224_10152726316017489_9126625694497702013_n.jpg?oh=04f8a674e75b7872d5bbd9f05f19a7f5&oe=54F6A6B3 Jammen jeg vil ha to is! To is!
  15. Puuuuusen da. Har broen hans også Ser søt ut, men skinnet bedrar
  16. Ønsker tips til forbedring. Alt ifra beinstilling til tøying og what not Sliter også med venstre skulder. Ødela den første gangen jeg var på gym og prøvde nedtrekk (utenom opplæring) er som om noe er revet av. Stoooor energi lekkasje derifra. svikter\gi etter fort. Noen som vet hvor jeg kan henvende meg for hjelp\øvelser\operasjon? Fysio, mauell terapeut etc?
  17. http://www.aktivshop.no/ De har rimelig utstyr. Kjøpte mitt eget der og er fornøyd.
  18. Married with children An idiot abroad
  19. Følger med her. Har noenlunde samme problemet med høyre korsrygg etter pers i mark og bøy. Vet jeg har stor styrke forskjell på høyre og venstre side av kroppen. Teknikken var nok heller ikke helt 100.
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